On June 7th of 1998, Jubilee held its first worship at Westminster Theological Seminary. It was indeed a new beginning. I was a young pastor not yet 35 years of age (I would be at the end of June that year), with hopes and fears intersecting somewhere inside my heart. At the first worship, many visitors came to congratulate a new beginning. I am sure that there was a lot of excitement in my heart, yet I do distinctly remember that I wasn’t feeling much of anything, probably due to being emotionally overloaded. It was as if there was a kind of numbness, an overwhelmed kind of numbness.
For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot of my own leadership, with a deep sense of personal shortcoming. But God has been so gracious to use me as he has to build up this church. It is a church that continues to strive to measure success not be the expansion of the institution but by the transformation of persons. As I look around, churches grow and mature not due to anything strikingly obvious. Often times, it happens when there is much prayer and dependence. I must be full of thanks for all those who prayed so much for Jubilee over the years. I remember saying that a church growth without prayer is a curse rather than a blessing. I think it rings true even more today in my heart.
Often times, my pride makes me defend the merits of our church rather than taking certain people’s criticisms with an attitude of honest self-reflection and evaluation. I must get over this state of defensiveness. I must face up to the shortcomings and areas of weakness and apply the utmost wisdom and sound judgement to make positive differences. The church of our glorious Jesus Christ has no ceiling of goodness, excellence and beauty. As glorious the Lord is, the church is glorious, because it reflects its Master, the Head. Those of us who have the loftly calling of leading the church must never measure success based on our own spiritual and moral limitations. As we rely completely upon the ever presence grace of our Lord, the blessing that he can endow upon his own church must be endless. We have to believe this and press on.
Thank you, many of you, for loving Jubilee as I have loved Jubilee. This church is the hope of the Delaware Valley and beyond. It is the hope for all of our lives.
I’m looking forward to another anniversary celebration at PBU tomorrow. It rained rather heavily today, but I am told that the weather tomorrow will be pleasant. Thank God for his provisions in every way.
